Some Newbies Don't Want Help

[noteven]

delete 

Edited June 7, 2019 by noteven

[richfaa]

I am glad to accept help if  I need it and we have several times. We have also offered help  more than once  and never had a bad experience with anyone.

[Matthew]

"You need help?

"YES!  While I finish setting up could you pull out the cassette black tank and dump it?  It overflowed on the trip here and...wonder where the 'help' went?"  😀

[FL-JOE]

20 hours ago, Matthew said:

"You need help?

"YES!  While I finish setting up could you pull out the cassette black tank and dump it?  It overflowed on the trip here and...wonder where the 'help' went?"  😀

Since I generally don't see much gray in a situation, only black and white, I would pull his cassette tank out for him, dump it next to his RV, replace it and then ask if there was anything else I could do for him...….wonder where my new neighbor went?

[Matthew]

Just now, FL-JOE said:

Since I generally don't see much gray in a situation, only black and white, I would pull his cassette tank out for him, dump it next to his RV, replace it and then ask if there was anything else I could do for him...….wonder where my new neighbor went?

Good come back!

[Kirk W]

3 hours ago, FL-JOE said:

I would pull his cassette tank out for him, dump it next to his RV, replace it and then ask if there was anything else I could do for him...….wonder where my new neighbor went?

Leaving the mess for park staff to clean up? Having been a campground host, I don't see much gray in this one either....    😝   Maybe just some smart remark might be sufficient to put the guy where he belongs? (I think I saw that commercial too!)

[FL-JOE]

Come on Kirk, are you kidding me?  Matthew and I were not serious with either of our posts.  It is called joking, you know, humor?  You should try it sometime.

[Matthew]

1 hour ago, FL-JOE said:

Come on Kirk, are you kidding me?  Matthew and I were not serious with either of our posts.  It is called joking, you know, humor?  You should try it sometime.

Agree, meant as humor.

 

Edited June 7, 2019 by Matthew

[RV_]

Good wordplay, and funny.

[Carlos]

Satire is a gray area of communication.  Some may call it a black art.  You have to use your gray matter well to understand it.

 

[Kirk W]

4 hours ago, FL-JOE said:

Come on Kirk, are you kidding me?  Matthew and I were not serious with either of our posts.  It is called joking, you know, humor?  You should try it sometime.

Just so that it is a joke, as was the comment about emptying the cassette which you responded to. Your reply didn't sound much like laughter..   😁

[FL-JOE]

As usual Kirk, you are correct.  Matthew wasn't using humor, I wasn't using humor, you caught us, good job.

[Darryl&Rita]

I'm starting to see why you might have been turned away. 

[FL-JOE]

I see humor isn't your strong suit either.

[Captain Happy]

The first year as a camp host I had a nice lady come into our park with a small toy hauler trailer (25 footer). She has been coming into this park for years for the whole 5 month season. And she had made reservations for a certain site that was on back row in a corner, which means it was kind of problem to get backed into. Not having met this nice lady before I went over and asked if she needed help getting backed in.  And I was told right off that she had been doing this for years, and I quote, "I''ve got my own way of doing this, so now go away". And believe me when I say, I never offer to help her out again that whole summer.

And I can now say that after 3 years as the camp host at this same park, "I've seen it all".

[Martin]

There are many of us out there that gratefully accept most any help offered. Lifelong boater,  but new camper. I pulled a new 5th wheel for the 1st time a couple months ago. I feel I am a capable guy, but I was apprehensive about my inexperience. My maiden voyage - my first campground, I was lucky enough to pull in beside a retired Navy veteran in an older 5th wheel, that after he realized by my comments that it was my first set-up outside of the dealership training - which was rushed, spent a hour over my shoulder explaining every move I needed to make. I didn't ask for or need all of this - honestly, but I was very appreciative of all of it nonetheless. My maiden voyage was without incident and this played a part.

[SnowGypsy]

I have seen people who simply do not pick up on "cues" given off by the other person making that person have to be less subtle in handling the, well, social misfit who can't take a hint.  Also, when it comes to "joking", it can be really hard to tell these days, because society.........Look at the "funny" videos where people are falling, babies crying, dogs crashing into the cupboard.......  Not funny to everyone.

We went out yesterday morning and a lady alone about our age said this would be her first time disconnecting and getting ready to pull out and was hoping it went well.  I told my husband "Come on."  and told her we were there to supervise.  Her son lived in town and hooked up/tightened up all the fittings.  My husband loosened the fittings after she tried and we gave her some other tips that she thanked us for several times.  This was her maiden voyage.

If you know how to "feel" people out (take a hint), I don't think you'll have a problem.  

[mptjelgin]

13 minutes ago, SnowGypsy said:

I have seen people who simply do not pick up on "cues" given off by the other person making that person have to be less subtle in handling the, well, social misfit who can't take a hint. 

I think that this is key.  If you see someone that you think needs help, offer it.  If they accept then you are in business.  Martin gives a great example of such an interaction a couple of posts up. 

But if they choose to wave you off, accept it and move on. For whatever reason they don't want your help, and that should be the end of that interaction.  If you decide to take it personally or decide to never speak to that person again, that's on you. 

[$ Spot]

Martin's post is a great example of courtesy and the community found among some RVers. His neighbor received a vibe from Martin, either implied or explicit, on Martin's 5er experience and wanted to be of some help and Martin was courteous enough to just let it happen. They each made a friend or in the least had a nice time, and I'd wager that their next meeting will be a pleasant one. 

     Spot

[FL-JOE]

Being courteous and at least offering help doesn't have to stop with just fellow RVers either.  Yesterday we had taken a motorcycle ride over to Devil's Tower.  There were 6 of us taking a break (3 couples) at the visitors center.  We spotted a couple in their 70's coming down the sidewalk in the crowd.  He only had a cane but was obviously in distress.  He could only barely put pressure on one leg and was taking small 5" or 6" steps.  

We went over to see if we could help.  He accepted and we helped him balance and move another several feet while his wife went to get the car.  We had to more or less lower him into the passenger seat.  He wasn't sure what had occurred with his leg but they were headed to the ER.

This was just a natural reaction for us.  It was not a natural reaction for the other 100 to 150 folks that were in the immediate area and probably witnessed this couples issue.

[Big5er]

On 6/8/2019 at 7:01 AM, Darryl&Rita said:

I'm starting to see why you might have been turned away. 

🤣🤣🤣

[FL-JOE]

Good one there slim.

[frater jason]

I enjoy helping when I can.  I gratefully accept offers of help when I need it.  I decline when  I don't need it.

I don't enjoy receiving lectures, scolds,  or blowhards relentlessly berating others with poorly-informed opinion  presented as fact.   (in general, not referring to this thread)

I have learned to quickly ID the "helpful" slingers of BS by the use of words/phrases like these:

• junk
• nothing but problems
• you can't
• you have to
• what you want to do is...
• and the overuse of imperatives

As Bernard Russell reportedly said:

Quote

The whole problem with the world is that fools and fanatics are always so certain of themselves, and wiser people so full of doubts.

As far as offering help to single women, I do not take zero-upside risks that could upend my life in a moment.  I am helpful if they request it or initiate conversation.

[Little•Sister]

On 6/1/2019 at 3:59 PM, rm.w/aview said:

Wonder, is this related to topic?

 

Oh thank you so much. I laughed till I cried. 

[packnrat]

if you really want to get them mad, set up chairs, tables and cold drinks.

then sit back and watch the show. and do not forget to post up the videos.

 

some just refuse any/all help.

some are just embarrassed to ask, or accept help.

some think they know it all.