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Wt & Bal Spreadsheet "Civilization" and Mom


Dollytrolley

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Folks,

 

As you may recall from time to time I have preached a bit about the advantages of active Weight & Balance management once you have obtained the baseline wheel and hitch loads for your truck and trailer.

 

Having been REQUIRED to live day to day with calculated real time Weight & Balance in aircraft and some Marine applications it was no big deal.....it was just a way of life.

 

About a year ago I cobbled together a Exel Spreadsheet (for my own use) that was able to provide real-time calculations for a KNOWN baseline truck and trailer combo and as you added or subtracted loads of any KNOWN location the spreadsheet updated ALL axle and hitch loads LIVE.

 

You could do infinite "what-if's" by moving axles, hitches, tool boxes, water tanks, Smart cars, Jeeps and even Dolly-the-paint-horse to different locations.

 

In it's native form the Weight & Balance Spreadsheet works as well as the data input into it........good data in...good data out........bad data in.....junk out......

 

I enjoy helping folks get a handle on the Weight and most important the BALANCE of the RV's that they operate.

 

I have a Problem..........

 

My mother-in-law has tragic memory-loss and very aggressive actions to almost care-giving institutions and caregivers.....most of the last year she has been expelled from several institutions and the task of 24/7 care has been mostly ours with very little help.

 

To make a tragic situation worse we found that moms assets had been stolen by several scumbags so I have been dealing with this in a rather ........unconventional manner after various law enforcement and public defenders have placed moms exploitation on the back burner..........

 

The good news is that I have been able to set a few "elephant traps" and a couple of the perps have had a "come to Jesus moment" and have decided to return the ill-gotten assets to mom..........presently a few larger elephants have decided to wonder down the ramp into a few more "elephant traps" and I am assured that more "come to Jesus moments" are soon to occur.........

 

Moms private care costs hover at around $125-$140k per year so the perps will need to come to Jesus with a serious "giving-back-spirit"........

 

As you might imagine a old geezer trapping elephants takes a bit of time and the "rest" of our time seems to be utilized keeping mom from finding the butcher knives and chainsaws......,,

 

The jest of our family tale of woe is that I have almost no time to spare these days so I was hoping that some spreadsheet geek(s) in the forum might want to take the basic spreadsheet and make it better for public use.....

 

Presently NONE of the cells are protected and the layout is not pretty ...........not pretty, but functions well for me .....but I am easy to keep happy ........(except when slaying elephants)......,.,

 

So IF some folks could put some lipstick-on-the-pig perhaps the spreadsheet might be something useful in the resource section of the forum.

 

Feel free to email me at mmcdan3189@aol.com

 

Drive on...........(watch out for the.......elephants)

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Dolly,

 

Sorry to hear of your issues and hope you catch the perps. We are going through similar issues with my mom but lucky she is still in the nursing home, but mentally totally lost to us with no recognition at all. She is also starting to become aggressive but fortunately is pretty much bed or chair ridden. We also dealt with theft of articles in the facility including clothing, her wedding ring from her hand, and even underwear. Luckily we took financial control early so not much loss of financial assets. Of course no one saw or will admit to anything. Some sorry folks in this world. We are now down to Walmart sweat pants and shirts. Sad to see an entire life now relegated to a stuffed animal, an old rocker, and a couple of pictures on a bedside table. Sometimes dying isn't such a bad thing. Try to keep the faith.

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Dolly,

 

Sorry to hear of your issues and hope you catch the perps. We are going through similar issues with my mom but lucky she is still in the nursing home, but mentally totally lost to us with no recognition at all. She is also starting to become aggressive but fortunately is pretty much bed or chair ridden. We also dealt with theft of articles in the facility including clothing, her wedding ring from her hand, and even underwear. Luckily we took financial control early so not much loss of financial assets. Of course no one saw or will admit to anything. Some sorry folks in this world. We are now down to Walmart sweat pants and shirts. Sad to see an entire life now relegated to a stuffed animal, an old rocker, and a couple of pictures on a bedside table. Sometimes dying isn't such a bad thing. Try to keep the faith.

As we get older and do have to take care of are parents, it's very hard. But thank the lord we find away to do it.

I'm very fortunate my sister was able to retire early and take care of our mom for 12 years after her she had a heart attack during a minor surgery and then her oxygen levels got to low resulting in her losing all short-term memory.

And My wife was able to stay home with her dad while he was in hospice at our house.

It was a very rough time in our lives but thank God we are able to do it and teach our kids what they need to do when our time comes.

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Dolly,

Sorry you are having to go through that process, we just went that route. Mom was in a nice care home for the last 8-9 years, mostly "Assisted Living" with her friends & family. The last 2 years in the "Memory Care" unit, and I have to say 99% of the care givers were angles. It seems there is always that 1% though. She lost many things besides her mind & health which upset us so much, because we couldn't get the authorities to act. We did recover some, but not all, and it made me crazy. I finally decided they we just "things". I don't know how someone can steal and swindle from old folks, then sleep at night. This has changed my mind as to how old I want to be when I die, but I will be 73 next month, and that sounds younger all the time. We have already whispered a prayer for you and yours. Mom died this February @ 100 years old, and it was time, but it is always a lose. Good luck, but more importantly Keep the Faith. Dick & Susan T

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My wife's mother just became a centurion.

 

Mayor_zpsd5pc9fcz.jpg

 

She's been with my sister in law for years and now with us for years (moved with us to Florida almost 4 years ago, Florida agrees with her). It is stressful at times, no doubt about it, particularly when mental faculties (short time memory) and physical abilities start diminishing and it's a "progress (not)" in one direction only. We did ease the stress somewhat by employing professional help couple of times a week, which gives (wife in particular) time off from this 24-7 task.

Couple of positives, however, in that arrangement. We kept crooks and charlatans away from her resources. Second, we had a very good friend (over 30 years) who had a misfortune of a massive stroke few years back, ended under the care of "the state". His family and children were not very proactive even though "there were options". We visited him for a couple of years, the we stopped. It was extremely depressing to see someone as capable and intelligent slowly turn into a vegetable because the state has too many of them to care. This sight had a lot to do with our decision..

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Dolly, sorry to hear about the issues with the mother in law, we hope it gets better soon.

 

Regarding your spread sheet, I might have some free time once we get through our upcoming move while I wait for the DW to join me in our new location in South Carolina while she wraps up her work situation up in MN. I will send you an email to discuss in more detail.

 

Dave

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Wow. One more reason to keep Mom home. I must say, not all caregivers are the above. One day my MIL got a call from her mother's Home (as above, no recognition of anything any more, full time care). "The laundry found your mother's rings in her sheets again, they won't stay on. What would you like us to do with them?" Result--she passed them on to my wife, who is now wearing her G-ma's "rock"--fits perfectly and she is THRILLED to have it. Says it reminds her to pray for her G'ma daily. THANK YOU to some honest health care workers!

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Dolly,

 

Sympathize with the financial predators also. When my dad died and we knew mom's mental capacity was deteriorating, my sister and I took over their financial portfolio. When I met with their "adviser " found their asset allocation was 80% equities/20% fixed income with a gimish of individual stocks and loaded mutual funds. My dad, who had managed the finances would not discuss his investments while alive (said he could handle it). That allocation is even a poor portfolio for a 20 y.o. much less a couple in their late 80's. After expressing my displeasure the "adviser" said he would help us by putting their funds in a variable annuity of course charging large commissions for selling their trash. Not no but, HELL NO! The annuity would have put nearly 2% of assets in his pocket for fees. After not so gentle threats of SEC, lawsuit for failure of fiduciary responsibility, elder abuse (I do my homework), we rolled into a safe AA with a major low fee fund company. Oh guess what, he "as a kindness for my mom's loss" did not charge commissions. Right! Dolly, there are lots of elephants. Successful hunting.

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