We made it!

[RV_]

14 hours ago, sandsys said:

Sharing a sense of humor helps as well. We've been married nearly 55 years and we laugh together several times a day.

Linda

We two too do do that too! 😂

[RV_]

5 hours ago, Second Chance said:

Congratulations, Derek. Last March would have marked 50 for my late wife and me. I thought my life was over - and then Laura came along. You won't have to think too hard to figure out my user name on the forums...

Rob

Rob that is wonderful! Sorry for the loss, glad for your "second chance! I will smile every time I see "Second Chance" from now on. Thanks.

[RV_]

3 hours ago, bigjim said:

I missed where Derek said that so I am glad Kirk brought it up. I find it ironically funny in a personal way. I have been single since 1980 and mostly happily so for personal reasons BUT I still sometimes say to myself sometimes, " I wish I had a wife to tell me what I want."  I usually just think it but once in line waiting to order food I said it out loud to myself and the lady behind me with her husband heard it and got really offended.  Oh well.  That just goes to show I recognize the value of a good team even after all these years and I certainly do not mean it in any negative way.

 

BigJim that is the way I might be were I left alone. I like to think I would figure it out but miss the second opinion. I look back at how some of my teen days girlfriends turned out and am very glad I was able to snag Lynda. I would definitely have been divorced had the one girl I proposed to before Lynda had not turned me down because I was not Jewish and her parents would have disowned her. She died ten years ago.

Lynn says that I provide the adventures and she happily rides my coattails. I was from Connecticut and already we both had lived all over the world as military brats. She makes my home and safe space. She also says I am "Missing the brain cell that puts other people to sleep when they try to read a lot of the stuff he reads!" like "The Protestant Ethic and the Spirit of Capitalism" by Max Weber. 😏

Edited September 8, 2022 by RV_

[Kirk W]

1 hour ago, RV_ said:

I look back at how some of my teen days girlfriends turned out and am very glad I was able to snag Lynda.

Can I ever second that one! My first romantic interest went on to get into drugs & alcohol and abandoned her husband and kids and last that I heard was institutionalized. The only girl that I was ever serious with sent me a "Dear Kirk" letter in the Navy about a month before a friend & I went to check out Disney Land. While there we met 2 girls there on semester break from college and Pam was one I spent the day with. I tell people that back in 1961 I visited Disney Land for the first time and while there I got myself a souvenir and I still have her today! 

[Second Chance]

22 minutes ago, Kirk W said:

Can I ever second that one! My first romantic interest went on to get into drugs & alcohol and abandoned her husband and kids and last that I heard was institutionalized. The only girl that I was ever serious with sent me a "Dear Kirk" letter in the Navy about a month before a friend & I went to check out Disney Land. While there we met 2 girls there on semester break from college and Pam was one I spent the day with. I tell people that back in 1961 I visited Disney Land for the first time and while there I got myself a souvenir and I still have her today! 

Good story, Kirk. I'm probably odd man out, but I'm afraid I can't relate. The first "crush" I had was at 13 in 7th grade. We waited until our first year of college to get married, though. It lasted for 36 really good years until she died.

Rob

[RV_]

Rob, lightning did strike you twice.

We met right after I arrived at Barksdale AFB Louisiana. A Connecticut Yankee, I was a stranger in a strange land. It was an "arranged" picnic by one of my fellow medic's local GF. Me and my roomie were introduced to two girls and I met Lyn. I wanted to marry her but felt we were too young and statistics said we were. I wanted to marry once for life. We dated for 18 months and every time I felt like proposing I broke up with her, three times! The last time I realized I was going to lose her and I went over and to her house and told her parents I was going to marry her. They approved and she was a bit more hesitant. I brought a ring so she decided I was serious and said yes. So we went to Galveston for the weekend before and eloped to a JP in Marshall because they did not require waiting on tests. I was an E-2 and her dad realizing what a wedding was going to cost offered us a weekend in Galveston and $5k if we eloped. We got a great financial start in 1972 on that and never looked back. We got pregnant immediately and then 2.5 years later had our second and last boy again by choice. We weighed whether we wanted to have our 20s to party nad have kids later when we should be earning more or have our kids gone by our early 40s and have the world our oyster with more imagined income to do what we wanted. Which we did. We still partied a little with babysitters. My Uncle was an Episcopal minister at a church in College Point L.I NY an hour from my hometown of Stamford and we traveled back there two years later with our toddler and got married in the church wwith all mu friends and family and the guitarist singer wa from the cast of Cats on Broadway then. Didn't cost us a penny. And despite being a priest he had a nice Harley full dress and I got to ride it solo as I had a Triumph 500 back home. Lynn did the Merritt parkway behind him as a passenger. On that trip. Helmets were required in CT but not in NY. It was 1974 and Lynn had no helmet, My uncle did not know it was required there, so they got stopped. She was wearing a tank top, no bra, and short shorts. My uncle said the cop gave him a look when he realized they were not related as if he'd been caught in an embarrassing situation. My UNcle aid he was so nervous he almost could not find his Minster's credentials to hand to the cop with his license. The cop would not let him take her home and they were nearby Stamford so they contacted me and I had to go get her.

Whether we were lonely or not I do believe we're older but no wiser for in our hearts the dreams are still the same.

 

Edited September 8, 2022 by RV_

[RV_]

1 hour ago, Kirk W said:

Can I ever second that one! My first romantic interest went on to get into drugs & alcohol and abandoned her husband and kids and last that I heard was institutionalized. The only girl that I was ever serious with sent me a "Dear Kirk" letter in the Navy about a month before a friend & I went to check out Disney Land. While there we met 2 girls there on semester break from college and Pam was one I spent the day with. I tell people that back in 1961 I visited Disney Land for the first time and while there I got myself a souvenir and I still have her today! 

Good story and glad you got a wonderful souvenir.

[Dutch_12078]

My only high school crush that I know about, besides my wife of course, eventually became a state senator. The first openly gay senator in her state in fact, so I guess there wouldn't have been any future for us anyway.

[Kirk W]

1 hour ago, RV_ said:

Whether we were lonely or not I do believe we're older but no wiser for in our hearts the dreams are still the same.

A good marriage is not a 50 - 50 situation but it must be 100% commitment by both parties. It is interesting to note that you felt thay you were too young as we had that feeling too but as it was the Navy kept separating us so we chose to marry in order that we could be together. We met and dated for about 5 months when I left CA for submarine school in CT. After sub school I spent about 10 days at her parents house to see her as my orders were to Pearl Harbor, where I was for just under a year. From there I went to Velejo, CA for nuclear power school, after spending another 10 days in southern CA to see Pam. At that point we made the decision to get married in December, just after the 6 months of classroom study. We met in early Jan, of 1961 and were married Dec. 22, 1962. Pam was 21 and I was 20 and an E4. The following Jan. I reported to prototype training in Idaho and our first home was an 8'X40" mobile home. Back in the 60's kids were not taught about birth control and so she was pregnante by the end or our first month and our son was born the following October. Lucky for us, part of a wife checking out of a Navy hospital with her baby at that time was a required lesson in birth control so the other two sons were born 3 years and 6 years later. We didn't get rich or famous, but that was never part of our plans or a goal of ours. We have had a pretty successful life when compared to our goals and those are the only standards that matter to us. We have 3 successful sons and 3 daughters-in-law that could not be more special if they had been born into our family. We have now been retired for more than 20 years, have visited all of the continental states & much of Canada, and are financially comfortable. What more can one reasonably ask for? 

EDIT: I should add that thanks to the hospitality of BruceT on these forums we also got to spend a month in Australia.

Edited September 8, 2022 by Kirk W

[Ray,IN]

On 9/7/2022 at 9:20 PM, RV_ said:

🤔

When Lin and I were in pre-marriage counseling, the minister said something I never forgot. He said " A successful marriage requires 100% effort, it doesn't just happen. Some days you(pointing to me) may only contribute 10%, that means Lin must contribute 90%, then some days the percentages reverse. Just as long as you both know 100% is the goal you marriage should work well".

Obviously you and Lynn have that same working philosophy. Many more happy years are wished for you both!

 

[RV_]

Kirk that quote "Whether we were lonely or not I do believe we're older but no wiser for in our hearts the dreams are still the same was from the song, "Those Were The Days" above not our lives! 😏

Thanks to all friends who offered kind words. We look forward to our 60th.