Hanging up the fulltime keys :(

[Dutch_12078]

I knew it was probably coming since my stroke last April, but hoped for better. During my appoint with my primary this morning that she requested, she dialed up a pre-arranged conference call with my cardiologist, neurologist, and physical therapist, and they all agreed that it wasn't safe for me to continue driving our motorhome for now. Some things they hoped would improve have unfortunately gotten worse. My stamina has declined to the point where I can't be active for more than a few minutes at a time, making hooking up the car for moves 15-20 minute process instead of the 5 minutes it used to take. My balance has also declined so much that I've been forced to move from using a single cane to using two canes, and recently to using a walker. The doctors did agree that I should keep our spring and summer NY State park reservations in place, in hopes that I'll improve enough by then. Our NY reservations are all within 2 hours or less of our Adirondack cottage and permanent camp site, and I was told not to make any further away than that. And in case anyone wonders, my wife's health conditions have kept her out of the motorhome drivers seat for the past several years, so that's not an option.

I suppose at 80, I expected it sooner or later, but I'll admit I was really hoping for later. Fortunately, my wife and I are both still cleared to drive our car, so that's a relief anyway. I have already started canceling 4 months of winter reservations at state and national parks in Georgia and Florida that were to start in January, but I think the one that will hurt the most will be our planned stay at the SKP Sumter Oaks park near Bushnell, FL. We haven't been there in a few years, and were really looking forward to getting back there. We're going to continue to live in the motorhome at our private site until the weather gets cold enough to drive us into the cottage. And I'll be working hard to get clearance from my doctors to drive the motorhome again by spring. I'll still hang around the forums to offer what ever help I can. Wish us well!

Edited November 1, 2023 by Dutch_12078
typo

[sandsys]

I do indeed wish you well. Hope is a wonderful thing.

Linda

[GR "Scott" Cundiff]

Wishing you the best.  There's a lot to be said for exiting the lifestyle gracefully rather than the result of some kind of catastrophe.  It sounds as though you are going to be able to ease into the next stage of life's adventure.  

[2gypsies]

My best to both of you.  Yes, it's difficult but I think we all knew it wouldn't last forever.  You've made good contributions to this forum.

[Kirk W]

Sorry to hear about the problems and understand. We left fulltime to be closer to Pam’s doctors 11 years ago now and sold our last RV last July. I’m a year older than you could keep going but that was not to be. Stick around and keep us updated as you are among friends. 

[sandsys]

I never consciously hung up my keys. I just let Dave drive me wherever I wanted to go until one day I realized I hadn't driven for about five years. I no longer trust myself to do so now. My sense of space when backing up is shot.

Linda

[Dutch_12078]

Thanks for the kind words everyone, and we do want to get well enough by spring so we can at least keep camping at our area state parks. We have reservations covering 2 weeks including Memorial Day, 2 week including the 4th of July, and a week at a fairly new NY state park that we haven't tried yet. Labor Day will be covered as soon as the reservation window opens. All are within 2 hours of our base. One of our daughters and her partner have offered to drive the motorhome to the campgrounds and help us get set up if necessary, but we hope that won't be necessary. It's very reassuring to know the help is available though.

It's going to take some getting used to this lifestyle change, but basically it just means going back where we were in 2005 when I retired and we bought our first motorhome. Of course we're not happy about it, but we'll sort it out eventually. Thanks again everyone!

[sandsys]

Many of us did some part-timing after full-timing and it does help make the transition to not going at all a little easier. Not going at all is still not easy but easier. You are lucky to have kids nearby willing to help. Keep on keeping on as long as you can.

Linda

[Dutch_12078]

1 hour ago, sandsys said:

Many of us did some part-timing after full-timing and it does help make the transition to not going at all a little easier. Not going at all is still not easy but easier. You are lucky to have kids nearby willing to help. Keep on keeping on as long as you can.

Linda

Thanks, Linda. Yes, both our daughters have been a godsend to us over the years, especially now that our daily lives have gotten more difficult. We're also fortunate that our grand daughter and her family live only about 20 minutes away from our favorite state park where we hope to be spending the most time next spring and summer on our favorite site.

[Kirk W]

We too have reached a point in life that we depend on our children at times in ways that they once relied on us. While we may regret the maladies of age, it very gratifying be to know that they are ready to step up for us in ways that we once did for our aging parents. 

[GlennWest]

On 11/1/2023 at 6:35 PM, sandsys said:

I never consciously hung up my keys. I just let Dave drive me wherever I wanted to go until one day I realized I hadn't driven for about five years. I no longer trust myself to do so now. My sense of space when backing up is shot.

Linda

My wife is about the same. She has her own car and I have to keep a charger on it so battery don't die. She hasn't drove it for a year now. 

[OKed]

Dutch

My husband was 80 in 2023.  I am his caretaker in a lot of ways but he is going strong even with diabetes.

We take care of campgrounds in the summers just to keep active

Wishing you and your wife happiness and keeping well 

[Dutch_12078]

10 hours ago, OKed said:

Dutch

My husband was 80 in 2023.  I am his caretaker in a lot of ways but he is going strong even with diabetes.

We take care of campgrounds in the summers just to keep active

Wishing you and your wife happiness and keeping well 

Thanks, OKed, we're trying our best. I posted my original message on Nov 1st last year, and 8 days later had a second stroke that kept me in the hospital for 5 days. A lot of ups and downs, but we're still hopeful about summer camping. 

My best wishes to you and your husband!

 

[Kirk W]

2 hours ago, Dutch_12078 said:

A lot of ups and downs, but we're still hopeful about summer camping. 

Sorry to hear about your latest difficulty! Pam has had a complete right ankle replacement (Inbone), right hip replacement, back surgery, 2 plates for broken right arm,  and last Friday her left knee. Since RVing is difficult at best when using a cane or walker, we sold our RV last summer. I'm not 81 (Pam almost 83) and we still plan to do some travel, just not by RV. Letting the RV go was not an easy thing to do since we had owned some type of RV since 1974 but I suppose all things must end one day. I have been pretty fortunate that I have few issues thus far but do find the part of caregiver to be more challenging this time. We are also at an age where we also need to be very aware of our driving skills, even with a car as there is little doubt that such things do diminish with age. 

Edited February 12 by Kirk W

[Dutch_12078]

2 hours ago, Kirk W said:

Sorry to hear about your latest difficulty! Pam has had a complete right ankle replacement (Inbone), right hip replacement, back surgery, 2 plates for broken right arm,  and last Friday her left knee. Since RVing is difficult at best when using a cane or walker, we sold our RV last summer. I'm not 81 (Pam almost 83) and we still plan to do some travel, just not by RV. Letting the RV go was not an easy thing to do since we had owned some type of RV since 1974 but I suppose all things must end one day. I have been pretty fortunate that I have few issues thus far but do find the part of caregiver to be more challenging this time. We are also at an age where we also need to be very aware of our driving skills, even with a car as there is little doubt that such things do diminish with age. 

I'm sorry to read about Pam's problems, Kirk, and I wish her the best for a speedy recovery. I'll be 81 next month, and if we do manage our summer camping trips, I think that will likely tell us whether it's time to put a For Sale sign in the RV or not. If we can't make those trips, I guess the question will answer itself.

[GR "Scott" Cundiff]

As someone said, "Getting old ain't for sissies."  Hang in there, friends!