Old newbies with elderly mother with dementia and step-father and husband with mobility issues and two large puppies

[SueEllenH]

Hello to all!

My husband has wanted to travel for quite some time.  My dad passed in June and after that I realized that we should go while we still can.  My mother will be moving to assisted living due to health issues, so she will be taken care of.  My husband's mom has dementia, her favorite two things in the world are camping and her baby boy (my husband).  So we've decided to sell it all, buy a fifth wheel toy hauler, and go camping.  I am in good health and will be care giver for the rest of our party.  My husband has had a few back surgeries and is able to walk now (after about 2 years of not being able to) and he can travel short distances at a time.  His favorite thing in the world to do is to fish.  We have a small pontoon boat that he can handle and makes fishing nice for him.  His step-dad is a larger man with mobility issues, but can get around somewhat and has an electric scooter for bad days (he also loves to fish.)

As soon as we can get everything sold (probably a few months) we will hit the road and go camping.  We are all very excited about it.  We plan to camp at campgrounds on/near lakes so the guys can fish.  Mom and I will enjoy relaxing, knitting, reading, cooking, etc.  Oh, and we have two dogs (from the humane society), they are currently 7 months old and already about 40 pounds each so they will be large dogs.

We currently live in the upstate of South Carolina.  Due to everyone's health issues we probably won't be able to go too far from this area due to having to still go to the occasional doctor appointment.

Has anyone ever traveled with health issues and/or dementia?  

Thanks to all!

Sue Ellen

[Kirk W]

Welcome to the forums! My mother (now deceased) had dementia as we were starting to fulltime and my wife had major health issues that forces us from fulltime after 12 years on the road. All that I can say at this point is,good for you! You need to do things while you still can.  

[2gypsies]

Welcome!  I admire you for what you're planning to take on.  You're talking of selling everything and taking off.  I'm wondering if you've ever RV'd before.  You might want to consider renting a RV for a trip and taking everyone to see how they all do.  Full-time RVing in itself is a difficult change for some.  For your mom with dementia... they like to wander so being in strange places might confuse her more.  She'll need watching as I'm sure you will do.  With these obstacles make sure you have a backup plan if it doesn't work out.  Best of luck to you!

[sandsys]

You can do this. The wandering may be the biggest problem so look for ideas relating to that soon. Bringing things from home that will make her feel at home can help. My MIL recognized her bed spread so felt at home in a new place. But when she stayed with me without bringing any of her own things besides clothes, she wandered.

Linda Sand

[RV_]

Good for you and welcome to the forums!

We were caregivers for a grandmother and my FIL and MIL. Grandmother had sever dementia and Alzheimer's and lived with us her last five years of life way back in 81-86.

We came of the road to care for the FIL and MIL. FiL had dementia and was not much of a problem. We just had to take his keys away.

My hat is off to you guys and I agree with all who said to do it while you can!

Safe Travels!

[SueEllenH]

19 hours ago, 2gypsies said:

Welcome!  I admire you for what you're planning to take on.  You're talking of selling everything and taking off.  I'm wondering if you've ever RV'd before.  You might want to consider renting a RV for a trip and taking everyone to see how they all do.  Full-time RVing in itself is a difficult change for some.  For your mom with dementia... they like to wander so being in strange places might confuse her more.  She'll need watching as I'm sure you will do.  With these obstacles make sure you have a backup plan if it doesn't work out.  Best of luck to you!

Yes 2Gypsies, we have rv'd quite a bit, mostly before we knew each other but also a little since we've been married (9 years).  We both grew up camping (tent and rv) and continued after we became adults.  This will just be our first adventure into rv'ing full time.   We are getting a small jewelry looking locator for MIL so in case she does wander away we will be able to find her.  We will be watching her closely, but we know it would be unrealistic to think that we can watch her every single minute.

[Jinx & Wayne]

I'm thinking you should carefully look at the means of transporting the mobility scooter and boat if your only vehicles will be the tow vehicle and RV.  If you have a chase vehicle you should be fine.

Wayne & Jinx
2017 F-350 diesel, dually
2006 Carriage Carri-Lite 36KSQ

[Kirk W]

1 hour ago, SueEllenH said:

This will just be our first adventure into rv'ing full time. 

I will be thinking of you as you begin this new adventure. When we traveled in the RV with my mother we always had her sleep where she would disturb us if she left the motorhome just to be on the safe side. It reached a point where we had no alternative but to place her into a long term care facility and even though she didn't want to go there, once she adjusted she lived there quite happily for several years with her declining condition and was actually happy and had better care than we could have given her. Each situation is different, so I'll not tell you what you should do but I do advise you to be aware of all options available.

[TXiceman]

That will be quiet an undertaking for you and I hope you hold up to the experience.  A 5er and a boat will require coordination to get everything on the move.  many states do not allow towing anything behind a trailer, so check this out.  If you have a separate chase vehicle t, someone will need to drive it and the boat.

Many campsites will require extra $$$ for the extra vehicle and the boat, so be sure and plan on this.

Here's to fair roads and a tailwind.

Ken